Hunk Friday: I'm just so torn...

So this Hunk Friday choice (better late than never, eh??) is actually quite controversial for me. On one hand:

It's Uncle Jesse! Look at that hair! And nobody can sing "Michelle Smiling" like this man. NOBODY.

On the other hand:

And that's not even the half of it. Not only does John Stamos look all strange and sound all funny with his new veneers, as evidenced at Bob Saget's Roast on Comedy Central, but he was quoted in the now-defunct Jane Magazine a few years back as saying this:

No John, no!! The world doesn't need to know such horrible things about you! Why have you ruined everything?!?

This tension between Stamos as man-myth and True Colors Stamos is so great that it haunts me even in my sleep. I once dreamed that John and I were actually dating, and throughout the whole of it, I was incredibly conflicted and even weighing the pros and cons in my head. As in the previous argument, the main pro was that I was dating Uncle Jesse. Uncle Jesse! Have mercy. However the whole age difference was troubling me, and as the dream went on and I thought more about what I was doing, I became physically less attracted to him. At one point he kissed me and I was like ew, no.

But the most bizarre reason that I decided that I didn't want to be dating Stamos was that I was troubled by his then-recent breakup with Rebecca Romijn. On one hand, I was concerned that I was the rebound girlfriend, and I didn't want that to happen. Yet even more disturbing was the thought that I might be the un-rebound girlfriend. Because then I'd be tied down to Stamos for the rest of my life and I really didn't want that. I was basically ruing the day I let matters escalate and had no idea how to get out of said situation. How does one break that news to John Stamos? One doesn't. He's Uncle Jesse!!

So, gentle readers, let me put this important decision into your hands. What are your thoughts? Is Stamos your dream hunk? Or are you still just hung up on Uncle Jesse?