Results tagged “better red than dead” from Overlooked

There's never an excuse for bad breath!

Yes, we’ve all heard these words before, but not with this sense of urgency or expectation. For whatever reasons you believe will bring it about, there is no reason why you should not be ready for it. In this post I hope to provide you with an idea of the basics you will need and want.

Firstly, and most importantly, you will need a shelter. Underground shelters are a little bit more expensive but they provide the best protection - from meteorological disasters and roving bands of heretical devil worshipers, to airborne space bacteria and the long arm of the law. I also recommend setting yourself up with a good quality composting toilet. The more you pay now for quality, the less plunging you do later, and you can use the compost for your herb garden! As for the rest it's all a matter of personal preference, so I'll let you decide on that.

Now, the next most important survival related issue: nourishment. I prefer your good old fashioned MREs. High caloric content for joules of energy, plus an excellent variety to suit any occasion! Remember to buy in bulk, because there won't be any convenience stores to shop at after the Communists take over! Ha Ha!...

You probably will want to supplement your MREs with some goodies. Cakes, puddings, meats, breads, and special bachelor treats are all exciting options. You may also want to look into alternative food and drinks. It doesn't all have to be bought food: some of the best meals I've ever had were ones that I procured and prepared myself (nucular fall-out permitting)!

So true.

For the tertiary area of concern: what to do? You will want to fill your hours with activities that don't take up a lot of space. I enjoy jigsaw puzzles; remember: the higher the piece count, the higher the fun count! FYI: Just make sure you don't lose any of the pieces though, it's a long long time to live with disappointment...

You may want to bring a pet along with you. I strongly recommend a cat or a small dog. Anything larger and they tend to take up too much space, and anything smaller really won't provide an emergency supply of food if your rations run out. And stay away from birds. I've got a little nook all set up for my Mr. Bootsy the Cat, and I've got treats for him too. Plus, he can provide his own compost, that's fun for everyone!

Now I hope that you have a better idea of what it takes to survive the upcoming Second Coming of Christ. And have fun with it! Let this post be your guide to a new world of your descendants!

Remember: Survivalism - not just for luddites and militiamen anymore!

P.S. You may want to order your items soon before the United States Postal Service is activated to do its real job. Avoid embarrassing shortages by buying in bulk.

They used to call him the Viet King Kong... for reasons that sadly will remain only legend for modern day supporters and fangirls alike.

You may call me Hanoi lengli, but to me, nothing is more sexy than power and a cause.

There is just something about Ho Chi Minh that makes him stand apart from the other dictators featured in my Communist memorabilia. Perhaps it is the shy smile, the creative sculpting of facial hair, or the quiet sparkle in his eyes that really draws me to him - it projects an image of softness and approachability, unlike the smug Stalin, whose cocky smirk probably alienated women just as well as it did capitalist countries.

Yes, my Ho Chi Minh commemorative plate is truly the treasure of my collection. I could stare at it for hours (and often find that I do!) and am often moved to write poetry. If you'll indulge me, I'd love to share one of my better haikus with you, in hopes that you too will be inspired enough to compose your own.

Here's to you, my sweet revolutionary angel.