Results tagged “hair loss” from Overlooked

   

There have been numerous times when I’ve been ashamed of my Thai heritage (in the 7th grade somebody asked me if it was weird for me to be riding a bus to school instead of a water buffalo). There have been even more times when I’ve been disgusted with the fact I am an American (watching George W. Bush win the presidential election—twice). But I never thought I would be ashamed of being Thai and American at the same time. That is, until last week after finding out Nicolas Cage’s new movie BANGKOK DANGEROUS was the #1 movie in the US.

Now I’ll ignore the fact that Nicolas Cage has been playing the same role (a caricature of himself) for the last two decades, was married to Lisa Marie Presley and is now married to a Korean a tenth his age and size because he knocked her up (Editor's note: Let's not forget that he named his son KAL-EL) but, seriously, Bangkok Dangerous?  Why is it that any movie or book that includes Bangkok or Thailand has to automatically involve drugs, hookers and guns?  I mean, as flattering as the rough 'n tumble, rock 'n’ roll lifestyle is, it's most definitely not for everyone.  This, however, isn’t even the real problem.

The real problem lies in Nicolas Cage’s hair.

Yes, that’s what I said - his hair.

When I was ten, I asked my dad why there were so many different actors playing James Bond. Why couldn’t they just stick with one?  He told me it was because they had to get a new actor when the current one was starting to go bald.  James Bond can’t be bald, you see? "No action hero can be a hero with a receding hairline," he said.

I guess Nicolas Cage never got the memo.

Nicolas Cage’s hair is a fashion atrocity.  It’s a mullet—an old man’s mullet, considering he doesn’t have anything in the front anymore.  Forget enacting new laws against the paparazzi, there should be one against balding men growing out the rest of their hair, especially Nicolas Cage.  Why can’t he take a hint from Bruce Willis and just shave it?  Now there’s a classy guy who also knows when to let go of his mop and still be totally kickass.  I would have let it slide if it was the first offense but unfortunately, this isn’t the case.  Let's get in the time machine and go back a decade when a little movie called Con Air was released.

And there it is again.  The hair’s awfulness can be even more enhanced if you imagine Trisha Yearwood singing, “How Do I Live” in the background (it being the movie's theme song, and all).

Well Nic, I’m sure uncle Francis and cousin Sophia would be proud.

Author's Note: Thank you to Ian and Kat for editing my raging Asian tirade.

PS- I didn't want to do this, but I just had to.  This picture is priceless.

Oh so foxy!

Editor's note (NOT lengli--let's be explicitly clear on that, thanks. ♥, lengli, who despises Nic Cage with every fiber of her being): Let's not be too mean, now; Nicolas Cage has been in a few good films (although they make up a dismally low percentage of his filmography). Raising Arizona, Rumble Fish and Wild at Heart are all pretty spectacular, at least, if you like good movies. If you like popcorn, there's always The Rock, Con Air and... ahem... Gone in 60 Seconds?

Oh, who am I kidding. That is a terrible movie, even if it does have Angelina Jolie straddling a stick shift.

OK ok...I watch American Idol. My last post mentioned I had "caught" the last few minutes of the show, implying I was not an avid watcher. Maybe I was trying to save face...whatever. I feel comfortable admitting it now, especially after Lengli's introspective post and the fact that she watches That's So Raven AND Degrassi. AI isn't THAT bad right? But I digress....I'm really here to get a couple of things off of my chest.


David Cook, with his hipster/emo rocker style irritates me to no end. Putting all talent aside, I just can't get passed his emover. Hannah, Bekah (shout out!), and I went on and on about it and we decided that men with actual receding hairlines should not have this hairstyle. Maybe that's what disturbs me the most, the fact that he's actually covering up his hair loss. So, David, if you can hear me, read up on hair loss, understand that it's OK and consider embracing it on prime time television by singing I've Got the Comb Over Blues.

Garrett Haley, you ghostly kid you. I don't even know what to say. Simon's use of "haunted" was probably the most accurate adjective to describe him and his performance. He's scary looking. Emaciation may be the "in" thing but this borders on either junkie or malnutrition. Maybe both? So Garrett, or maybe Garrett's momma, since he's 17 and all, read up on malnutrition and get your boy out of the spotlight before he makes children cry. You don't want kids to cry do you?